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Urban Unity: A tale of peacekeepers. Chapter I. Freelance police Sam and Max.

Cartoon Porn Story: Urban Unity: A tale of peacekeepers. Chapter I.

She was trapped in the dark alleyway like a rat at a dead end in a maze. On one side towered a hard and cold stone wall, surely the foundations of some corporation which only purpose was to feed on the poor people of New York and milk them for every cent they’re worth. A legal criminal organisation like so many. But such a potential organisation was the last of her worries as the three thugs honed in on her, wielding chains and lead pipes.

She turned to face them, the fear in her eyes absolute. At age twenty-two, the lady was already a hottie and had the brains to go with the body to boot. When she had moved to the big city, her parents had warned her about being alone at night. But she had only known the safe haven of her hometown and had let innocence get the best of her. Now her purse was the least of her worries as the thugs lewdly licked their lips in anticipation. They were the kings of the night and knew no hero would come to save the damsel in distress.

Out of desperation, she threw her purse at them, which the right thug easily caught. “Here! It’s all I have! Please, leave me alone!” But they only laughed.

“Not before we get our fun,” the bandit replied as he threw the purse behind his shoulder. It would never touch the ground.

Numerous things then happened at once. The young woman crouched, trying to protect herself. The thugs took only one step further and all three were kicked to the side. Surprised, they found themselves face to face with giant, man-sized turtles, all four ready for action with the purple bandana wearing one holding the purse in his three fingered hand. But the criminals had heard of the legends and soon they were back on their feet, weapons drawn and ready to strike.

However, without the ninjutsu training the four brothers had, the fight was over before it even began. The turtle holding the purse placed it on the large dumpster on which he was standing and as if on cue, the mutant teenagers leapt forward, weapons ready. Metal clashed against metal as the silent heroes struck down the criminals. Soon, they were out cold and ready to be picked up by the police after an anonymous call would be placed.

It would take a long moment before the woman would dare open her eyes and by then, her rescuers would be long gone. But she would always cherish the second chance she had been given by her mysterious saviors and would live the rest of her life in a safer fashion.

The next day, but in a different part of the world, freelance police Sam and Max were in their office, laying lazily in their chairs with their feet on their desks as a small fan blew at full speed, turning first to the dog and then to the lagomorph. The day before, they had foiled the plot of a dangerous madman bent on using solar power to dominate the world. But their success came at a price as the doomsday device exploding created a massive heat wave over the city. Scientists had assured that the heat would subside but it would nonetheless take many days. And in the meantime, neither makeshift investigator could muster the energy to do anything, let alone stop crime. They couldn’t even take popsicles out of the freezer without them melting on the spot.

“Damn fur coat!” Max bursted suddenly. He bounced around the room, scratching and pulling his fur. “Shave me Sam! Skin me! Take it all off!”

“Now now little buddy,” the dog replied in his usual cool demeanor. “We both know that having you shaved and skinned never resolved problems before. Remember when Duke Cavadre used his death ray against you and you turned into a savage skeleton? I still have your teeth marks on my behind.”

“I guess you’re right, but hey, at least we got a good T-shirt logo out of it.”

But every word was a chore to pronounce. Max fell lying down on the floor as the duo turned back silent. And just as they were going to suffer silently some more, the phone rang, bringing about the very foreseeable plot twist which would move this story forward.

“I’ll get it,” Max said without much enthusiasm as he extended his arm towards the general direction of the distant phone. Once he failed to reach it, he simply shrugged. “Oh well, I tried.” Which left Sam with his regular phone answering task.

“Hello? Yes? Yes? Ah! You don’t say. Holy coating of wax on a soldier’s boots, we’re on our way.” He turned to his partner as he hung up the phone. “That was the commissioner Max. There’s been a group of vigilantes causing ruckus and we have to go stop them.

“Aw, but I don’t want to get up. It’s too hot outside.”

“Don’t worry little buddy, the commissioner is sending us to get them in the big city.”

Intrigued, Max jumped to his feet. “You mean… Washington D.C.?”

“Nope”

“Chicago?”

“Un un.”

“Los Angeles?”

“Getting colder.”

“Austin?”

“Afraid not.”

“Miami?”

“I would have preferred.”

“Tokyo?”

“Too far.”

“Duckberg?”

“Not this time.”

“Shelbyville?”

“I wish.”

“Pleasentville?”

“They banned us, remember?”

“Gotham City?”

“Wrong vigilante.”

“Quahog?”

“Maybe later.”

“Robotropolis?”

“Too apocalyptic.”

“Angel grove?”

“They have their own heroes.”

“Baldur’s Gate?”

“I left my sword in my other suit.”

“Bedrock?”

“Perhaps another time.”

“Smallville?”

“Wrong state.”

“Mos Eisley?”

“Wrong planet.”

“Zion?”

“Wrong time period”

“Liberty City?”

“Almost…”

“New York?”

“Yup.”

“Oh boy! Cooling off, sight seeing and a license to destroy. It’s like a vacation!” Max shouted as he leapt to the door, soon followed by his canine friend. Minutes later, their trusty Desoto was hitting the highway. Max lowered his window to feel the cool wind against his face. As they got further and further from the city, the temperature lowered to more acceptable levels. The lagomorph found himself passively enjoying his new found comfort, simply relaxing, eyes closed, almost ready to fall asleep. But a full fourty-four seconds later, his eyes popped side open and he uttered those famously dreadful words.

“Are we there yet?”

“Not yet little buddy, we still have an undetermined amount of time left before we arrive.”

“But I’m soooooooo bored!” the rabbity-thing pouted. And then, he had a glimmer in his eyes. “I know what we could do,” he said in a mischievous tone. One glance to the side left no doubt in Sam’s mind what his friend was thinking.

“Car sex? I don’t know, we’ve already done that before…”

“But we can do this differently! There’s a highway this time and you could make me drive while I sit on your lap. Pleeeeeeease?” Sam glanced over and found his horny friend on his knees

“Well I guess…”

to be continued…

Author is Bahamut Dragons

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This entry was posted on Friday, May 22nd, 2009 at 12:41 pm and is filed under Stories, T.M.N.T.. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. Both comments and pings are currently closed.