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Unlikely Babysitters. Chapter II. Milhouse and Maggie.

But Milhouse still obliged his friend and Maggie followed, sucking on her pacifier as she descended the stairs on her own with uncanny dexterity for a baby.  Once she reached the bottom, Maggie toddled after her brother and his friend, tripping on her own dress as she often did on flat even surfaces.  She got to the couch just as Bart began setting up the scenario which would all but ensure Milhouse’s demise and began whimpering to the two boys.  Groaning, Bart looked down to his baby sister and quickly smelled the problem.

“Hey, go change Maggie for me while I set this up.”  Bart said nonchalantly.  He welcomed Milhouse’s distraction, it would help him hide all the handicaps he would give his friend in the game, but Milhouse was shocked.  He had never changed a diaper before, not to mention even have to deal with a baby so matter of factly.  He usually caved to Bart’s demands, but at some point, a line had to be drawn.

“You change it, it’s your sister after all,” Milhouse answered defiantly, his voice shaking slightly.

“What’s the matter Milhouse my boy, afraid of what a little pussy might do to you?” Bart smirked and winked at his friend.  The term ‘pussy’ was still fairly new to him and he never used it around his parents, but it made for the perfect come back.

“Oh course not!  It’s just… come on Bart, it’s poo!”  The boy was clearly repulsed by the idea of handling excrement, and Bart was also a bit right as well, although unknowingly.  Milhouse had no experience with the female gender and had never seen a girl nude.  Even if she was just a baby, the idea of seeing Maggie naked made him nervous.  He was about to add something else when the baby whimpered even louder, her eyes filling with tears now.  Bart, clearly not in the mood to hear her bawl, quickly spoke up.

“Listen Milhouse, if you change her I’ll set your health to 150%,” he proposed, obviously not used to giving such a generous handicap to anyone.  Milhouse’s gaze went from the television to the baby and after a few tense seconds he finally caved in and picked up the fussy baby, not because of Bart’s offer (he couldn’t care less about it) but rather because he knew that he would bend to Bart eventually.  If he could at least avoid Maggie any further discomfort, he might as well.

Using the tip of his fingers, the boy brought Maggie back up to her room where her changing table and spare diapers were.  He set her on the table and took a deep breath, wincing at the faint smell but trying to calm himself.  He then undid Maggie’s blue pyjamas and set them aside, revealing the white diaper and tiny yellow belly button of the child.  Bracing himself, Milhouse unfastened the straps of the diaper and let it unfurl, revealing Maggie in all her glory.

The moment the diaper was off, she became visibly more relaxed as the mess no longer stuck to her body.  Looking down, Milhouse was relieved to see that although it did reek, it was a solid lump that was easily rolled into the diaper and discarded.  Punching his nose with one hand and wrapping the wipes with the other, Milhouse gingerly wiped her hindquarters of any excess mess, before grabbing a second wipe and running it along her front side.  In response, she cooed and moaned when the tissue and fingers holding it slid along side her undeveloped labia.  The boy was surprised at her response and stiffened for a moment, before proceeding again, this time carefully avoiding her genitals and cleaning the rest off.

The fetid odor gradually dissipated with each wipe.  Once he was satisfied with his work, the boy searched the desk for a clean diaper and found them all sorted out by cartoon characters represented on them.

“So which do you prefer Maggie?” Milhouse asked, pulling out a diaper in each hand.  “Baby Looney Toons or Mickey Mouse?”  The baby seemed thoughtful for a moment before choosing Mickey.  The blue haired boy smiled and quickly went to work placing the diaper under her and fastening the straps.  He then put her back in her pyjamas and he carried her back down to the living room, setting her on the floor next to her blocks.  He was about to join Bart, when something peculiar caught his glance. Looking down at the blocks, Milhouse suddenly noticed a stack of them spelled out the word “sex”.  He knew it was purely coincidental, but it brought back memories of the moan he had heard the youngest Simpson make earlier.

Shaking his head of the thoughts, he quickly snatched a controller and joined Bart, hoping the adrenaline rush of the game would help get his mind out of the gutter before his body reacted.  True to his word, Bart had set his friend’s health to 150% but had set his own to 300%.  Still, having Bart at only twice his health was a better advantage then he was used to and in normal circumstances, he might manage to score a few points.  But no amount of game play could have brought the boy’s mind back from that moment in the bedroom.

“Come on Milhouse!” Bart finally yelled.  “You’re not even trying!”  Even though the spiky haired boy gave himself such unjust advantages, he still wanted his victims to fight for their lives and it was clear to him that Milhouse wasn’t.

“I’m sorry Bart, I…” but Milhouse could only turn his eyes away.  “It’s getting late, I should get back home.”  But Milhouse couldn’t have fooled anyone with his act, not even Bart.  Besides, it was still early in the afternoon and there had been plans of him staying over for dinner.  Putting his controller down, Bart fixed his gaze directly on the obviously distraught boy.

“You were never good at lying Milhouse so spill it,” Bart said, his voice commanding and final.  Now backed into a corner, Milhouse stammered, his mind trying to come up with an explanation, any explanation… but Bart was right: he was not good at lying and you can’t lie to a liar, especially a master of the art like Bart.  Taking a deep breath, he blurted out what had happened when he changed Maggie, her soft moan and the blocks spelling out that inciting yet taboo word: sex.

Bart walked up to the blocks and turned around them a few times.

“Milhouse my friend, I think you’ve finally lost it.”

Not understanding, Milhouse met with Bart and looked down as well.  The only word he could find among them was DOG.  Milhouse shook his head, looking around to see if he had missed something, but finally had to concede that his temptation made him see things.

to be continued…

Author is Bahamut Dragons

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This entry was posted on Sunday, February 22nd, 2009 at 5:34 pm and is filed under Simpsons, Stories. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. Both comments and pings are currently closed.